Defining Success

To coin a phrase from one of my friends Tracy Depue... 

What's on my mind today...

I've been doing some reflecting during this time of year, as I think most people are also doing during November. I’ve been reflecting on the past year, my heart, my life, my struggles, my health, my spiritual life, what inspires me, what my goals are and have I been accomplishing the goals I have set out for myself in the last year?? Am I doing the things that are important for me to be doing?? As an Enneagram 9, I do a lot of things. I’m always busy. I’m always doing something, I’m not always doing the important things, the things that NEED to get done. I’m still learning how to apply and use this Enneagram wisdom in my life.

I sometimes have this feeling that I am free-falling in life with no direction, no course. Who knows where I’m going?? I have chased the rabbit down the hole. However, I think these feelings of free-falling are mostly because I haven’t had enough sleep and they are sorely incorrect. It’s the voice in my head giving me bad information. In reality, I think that as an adult I have been intentionally listening and hearing God; following the nudges he is giving me and steering my life in these paths.  

All of this reflecting and chewing on this big picture of my life I have made a decision. This is sort of a big deal for me. I am going to make a paradigm shift in my thinking.  

Here’s some backstory.

I believe that one of the best ways we can understand other people is to understand the way they define words. I have noticed that when someone takes time to understand how I see the world and how I define the terms I use for describing the world they have more compassion for me. The same applies to for me, when I spend time with a friend and I ask them to define a word that they have used to define something in their life I can better see how THEY see the world and this helps me to see how they see the world. Doing this creates so much more compassion in me for them. I feel more connected to that person. My understanding of my job as a follower of Jesus (and one of the most important things that Jesus modeled for me in the bible) is that he spent time connecting with people. He would sit with them, go to their houses, have meals with them, pray with them, heal them. He listened to them. All different kinds of people, there were super successful rich people, the everyday middle-class working folks, and the poor who had nothing.   

Powerful stuff. Jesus had gratitude and compassion for each person that was reinforced by him talking to them. So, how do I apply this in my life?? Good question, I know!!  

Which then brought me to this question. How can I better connect with myself and who I am?? So, I started asking myself to define words that I use to define my own life, who I am, the situations that I am living through. I have spent some time now journaling definitions of words that I use. I’m grateful for this process because I did find more compassion for myself. What I found is that I have not been concise enough with myself. 

Here it is, my paradigm shift is for the word success.  

I use the word all the time. I probably overuse it to be frank. Here is my current definition of success: 

Success is when something is accomplished. A goal is set, and it is achieved. When I set out to do something that something gets done. My definition of success doesn’t include money. Money is a hot topic for me, that I’ll discuss in another blog post for another day.  

What is your definition of success?? Is your definition similar to mine?? How do you use the word success to define your world??  

My definition doesn’t feel to me like it gets to the heart of what success really is. It’s like my definition is too small. Does that make sense?? It’s like I put success in a box. I think success is much much bigger than simply accomplishing things. I think it needs to be broader and need to encompass more of my being. Here is my new definition of success:

Success is the ability to recognize and feel joy.

This definition is bigger clearer don’t you think?? I have joy when I accomplish things, and I can see joy when I set out to do something and I do then I am filled with joy.  This shifts “success” for me into a bigger space YET it feels more attainable.

Do you want to better connect with yourself?? Do you have words that need redefining?? I can help you with that. Call, email or text me and we will sit down and talk about your view of the world and how you can better get to know yourself.